This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I asked him if we were exclusive and he followed up with, "If a tree falls in the woods and no ones around, does it still make a sound?" Wtf am I supposed to do with that?!
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
