she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Randomize