i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
