did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize