I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Randomize
