You just made me feel so damn special
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
people are starting to question the shark bite story
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I'm full of awesome ideas
Yesss you are. Im full of confusion. I keep finding peanut butter on my legs...
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
Randomize
