me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
