I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
He asked to "fluff my boner.."
first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
