Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
