Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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