Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Randomize