My room smells like vodka and shame
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Watching her eat just hurts me
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
Hypothetical question: Would it be wrong to tell the annoying children who don't listen to their parents that the motel is haunted?
Randomize
