id be glad to
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize