garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
