Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
You played "let it burn" by usher 28 times, knocked over the 36 gallon fish tank, and passed out in the kitchen. Yeah...That drunk.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize
