I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
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