That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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