Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Grilled cheese and whiskey for lunch is why i should NEVER be a housewife.
I am trying to take a picture of a man in a wheelchair trying to ship a michael jackson portrait
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
I did not marry a roomba.
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