Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
