Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool
We are all done wearing pants today
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Randomize
