I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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