I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
