i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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