The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Nothing much. Just taking shots of tequila before I go get a bikkini wax. You?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize