all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize
