He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Dude I'm fucking tired of freshman, there are god damn teeth marks on my dick again
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
