Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
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