We won't sleep together?
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Randomize
