Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
who knew "i drink your milkshake" would work as a pickup line
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
you made out with another girl for some wings
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
