I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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