haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
