how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize
