i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
ugly people sure do ruin things
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I like literally had a visual image of his penis going into your soul
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Randomize
