I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
