Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
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