I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Randomize
