Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
It's a family event: you have to drink. No way around it. Its the law.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
