Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Randomize