Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize
