just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
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