OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
