So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
