idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Randomize
