I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
Randomize
