you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
Randomize
