When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize