I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Randomize
