Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
