I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
