I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Call me back. I want to hear your side of the dead cat in my garage story.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Dude. I don't even want cuddles. I just want an acknowledgement that I just had balls in my mouth.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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