Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize
