normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My ass is underappreciated
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
