Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize