17 year olds will be the death of me.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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